Lewis Black’s faux anger is hilarious and justified as he nails advertisers misusing the term “artisanal”. 

It’s not that often that comedy news personality breaks out a dictionary to clarify a specific word.  But Lewis Black is so diligent in his tirade against marketers claiming their products are artisanal he could take it to court:

Lewis makes the age old grip:  “These people (meaning marketers) are pissing on our legs and telling us it’s champagne.”  For some, that’s what the very definition of what marketing is.

Why do Dunkin Doughnuts, Domino’s, and others make absurd claims about their products being artisanal, all-natural, homemade, homegrown, genuine, pure, healthful, or as nature intended?  They’re not fooling Lewis Black, and in reality they’re probably not fooling that many “trust-fund hipsters” either.

Much of it has to do with anchoring and creating a placebo effect.  Both are reactions people have to language marketers know how to exploit.

Anchoring is the tendency we have to base our reactions on the first piece of information we receive.  When you see a coat’s original price was $175, and the sale price is $70, you can’t help but feel you’re getting a great deal.  If you’re really honest with yourself, you realize that the store never meant to sell the coat at $175.  They over-mark as an anchor to make the “sale” price seem more attractive.

Similarly, the placebo effect happens when assumption alter our reactions.  When you pay more for a bottle of wine, it tastes better because you paid more for it.

What’s really interesting about both anchoring and the placebo effect is that both work even when we’re aware of their influence.  We know Domino’s pizza is not being hand-made in small batches by a guy from Naples they flew in to work at a strip mall.  But just the thought of it, anchored in our minds, changes our experience.

Likewise, we know Sargento’s cheese isn’t being “lovingly hand-crafted by handsome peasants”, but the mental image creates an expectation that influences our experience.

Marketers know that many of us hearken back to a time when our food was made with more care, using natural methods.  They want to plant the idea that their products honor those traditions.  It works more than most of us like to admit.

We know it’s piss, not champagne running down our legs.  But tell us it’s champagne anyway.  We can almost taste it.